What Is Love? | Every Teenager Should Know

At the point when we love somebody we experience similar positive musings and encounters as when we like an individual. However, we likewise experience a profound feeling of care and responsibility towards that individual. Being "enamored" incorporates all the abovementioned yet additionally includes sentiments of sexual excitement and fascination

From songs and poems to novels and movies, romantic love is one of the most enduring subjects for artworks through the ages. But what about the science?Historical, cultural and even evolutionary evidence suggests love existed during ancient times and across many parts of the world. Romantic love has been found to exist in 147 of 166 cultures looked at in one study.

What Is Love? | Every Teenager Should Know
What Is Love?

The complexity of love has much to do with how people experience it differently and how it can change over time.Psychological research over the past 50 years has investigated the differences between liking someone, loving someone and being “in love”.

Liking is described as having positive thoughts and feelings towards someone and finding that person’s company rewarding. We often also experience warmth and closeness towards the people we like. In some instances we choose to be emotionally intimate with these people.

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When we love someone we experience the same positive thoughts and experiences as when we like a person. But we also experience a deep sense of care and commitment towards that person.Being “in love” includes all the above but also involves feelings of sexual arousal and attraction. However, research into people’s own views of love suggests that not all love is the same.

Passionate vs companionate love

Romantic love consists of two types: passionate and companionate love. Most romantic relationships, whether or not they be heterosexual or same sex, involve both these parts.

Passionate love is what people typically consider being “in love”. It includes feelings of passion and an intense looking for someone, to the purpose they could obsessively believe eager to be in their arms.

The second part is understood as companionate love. It’s not felt as intensely, but it’s complex and connects feelings of emotional intimacy and commitment with a deep attachment toward the romantic partner.

How does love change over time?

Research watching changes in romantic love over time typically finds that although passionate love starts high, it declines over the course of a relationship.

There are various reasons for this.

As partners learn more about one another and become more confident within the long-term way forward for the connection , routines develop. The opportunities to experience novelty and excitement also can decline, as can the frequency of sexual intercourse . this will cause passionate like to subside.

Although a discount in passionate love isn't experienced by all couples, various studies report approximately 20-40% of couples experience this downturn. Of couples who are married in more than ten years, the steepest downturn is presumably to occur over the second decade.

Life events and transitions also can make it challenging to experience passion. People have competing responsibilities which affect their energy and limit the opportunities to foster passion. Parenthood is an example of this.

In contrast, companionate love is usually found to extend over time.

Although research finds most romantic relationships contains both passionate and companionate love, it’s the absence or reductions in companionate love, moreso than passionate love, which will negatively affect the longevity of a romantic relationship.

But what’s the purpose of love?

Love is an emotion that keeps people bonded and committed to at least one another. From an evolutionary psychology perspective, love evolved to stay the oldsters of youngsters together long enough for them to survive and reach sexual maturity.

The period of childhood is far longer for humans than other species. As offspring believe adults for several years to survive and to develop the talents and skills needed for successful living, love is particularly important for humans.

Without love, it’s difficult to ascertain how the human species could have evolved.

A biological foundation too

Not only is there an evolutionary foundation to like , love is rooted in biology. Neurophysiological studies into romantic love show that folks who are within the throes of passionate love experience increased activation in brain regions related to reward and pleasure.

In fact, the brain regions activated are an equivalent as those activated by cocaine.

These regions release chemicals like oxytocin, vasopressin and dopamine, which produce feelings of happiness and euphoria that also are linked to arousal and excitement.

Interestingly, these brain regions aren't activated when brooding about non-romantic relationships like friends. These findings tell us that liking someone isn't an equivalent as being crazy with someone.

What’s your love style?

Research has found three primary sorts of love. First coined by psychologist John Lee, the love styles are eros, ludus and storge. These styles include people’s beliefs and attitudes about love and act as a guide for a way to approach romantic relationships.


This sort of love refers to erotic love and is concentrated on sexual desire and interesting in sex, the fast development of strong and passionate feelings for an additional and intense intimacy.


This style involves being emotionally distant and sometimes involves “game-playing”. It’s not surprising people that endorse this love style are unlikely to commit, feel comfortable ending relationships and sometimes start a replacement relationship before ending the present one.


Storge is usually considered a more mature sort of love. Priority is given to having a relationship with an individual who has similar interests, affection is openly expressed and there's less emphasis on physical attractiveness. People high on storge love are trusting of others and aren't needy or hooked in to others.

Or may be a mixture more your style?You may see yourself in additional than one among these styles.Evidence suggests some people possess a mix of the three main love styles; these mixtures were labelled by Lee as mania, pragma and agape.

Manic love includes intense feelings for a partner also as worry about committing to the connection . Pragmatic love involves making sensible relationship choices find a partner who will make an honest companion and friend. Agape may be a self-sacrificing love that's driven by a way of duty and selflessness.

Why does one love the way you do?

A person’s love style has little to try to to with their genetics. Rather, it’s related to the event of personality and a person’s past relationship experiences.

Some studies have found people that are high on dark traits, like narcissism, psychopathy and machiavellianism, endorse more of a ludus or pragma love style.

People who have an insecure attachment style, involving a high need for validation and preoccupation with relationship partners, endorse more mania love, while those that are uncomfortable with intimacy and closeness don't endorse eros love.

No matter the differences within the way love is experienced, one thing remains common for all: we as humans are social animals who have a deep fascination for it.

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